Assalamu Alaikum my dear,

One of the things I often do with my kids is set goals. We sit together at the beginning of the year, before Ramadan, or ahead of a big journey to reflect and set intentions. Some of them get excited, but others? Let’s just say they’re less amused. 🙂

Their argument is always the same: “Oh, but we haven’t achieved the goals we set last time.” And almost every time, I respond with a question:

“How did you learn to walk?”

Did you wake up one day, decide you were done with crawling, and just start walking? Of course not. Even if you had the determination, the reality was a long process—falling down, getting up, stumbling, and trying again. And yet, here you are, walking effortlessly today.

They’ve heard this dialogue from me countless times. Most of the time, I hear nothing but pin-drop silence afterward. 🙂

But isn’t this how many of us go through life? We think setting a goal, making a resolution, or deciding to change will magically lead to success. And when things don’t go as planned, we feel discouraged, believing we’ve failed.

I’m sorry to break it to you, but that’s not how life works. Growth doesn’t happen in a straight line—it happens in the struggle.

The truth is, strength is built in adversity. It’s the Sunnah of Allah subuhanawut’ala to test us, not to break us, but to shape us. Just like ore must endure 1000 degrees of fire to become gold, we, too, must go through challenges to reach our true potential.

If you want to become gold, you must embrace difficulty.

This is where the Anti-Fragile Mindset comes in.

Most things in life are either fragile or strong. A glass is fragile—it breaks under pressure. A rock is strong—it withstands force but remains unchanged. But you? You have the ability to be something better. You can be anti-fragile—where the more pressure, the more difficulty, the more challenges you face, the stronger you become.

Just like muscles grow when stretched beyond their comfort zone, your character, resilience, and faith grow when tested. Every hardship, every setback, and every challenge isn’t here to break you—it’s here to build you into something greater.

So, the next time you feel like you’re failing, like the struggle is too much, remember: this is your fire. This is the process that is turning you into gold.

Challenges make us stronger.

May Allah subuhanawut’ala grant you the strength to embrace the struggle, the wisdom to see its purpose, and the patience to emerge stronger than before.

With love and gratitude,
Rushdhi

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